cuteisawayoflife | (no subject)

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[Right now, if she were at home, Quinn would be planning out her Thanksgiving strategy: eating just enough to be polite, but not enough to make a pig of herself and gain weight like most people do. Or in Dad's case, end up with heartburn.

She'd also be awaiting a visit from her grandmothers and aunts, a novelty which would wear off once the fighting started. Rita and Mom screaming at each other until Mom was unbearable to be around, Grandma Ruth criticizing Mom at every turn, Dad ranting on and on about Grandpa, Daria and Amy sitting off to the side grinning and eating popcorn. And if Brian and Erin came, twice the tears and twice the screaming.

But they're her family, and she misses them. It's been two years since she's had a proper holiday with them, geeky and embarrassing as overbearing "family days" are. Plus, the weekend after Thanksgiving always has some of the best sales! (Then again, it's a little hard to get excited about fifteen percent off when everything here is free.)

Right now she's decorating her and Daria's place with cute little brass leaves and colorful candle holders, and she's made some potpourri with dried cranberries. Cranberries always smell so good, and they're such a fashionable shade of red, too!]

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Hmm, let's see...Fashion Club is on Thursdays, and I don't seem to have any plans tomorrow, so that should work!

Fine. You're responsible for watering it, too. [Ok, now she's pretty much seeing how far she can get Quinn to go because of how much she wants the tree. It remains to be seen whether Quinn will take on all these promised chores.]

Well, duh, of course I'm gonna water it! It's a tree, Daria, it's not like a dog that needs walking and bathing all the time! [Puppies are precious, but they're also messy. Which wouldn't stop Quinn from taking one home if she found one.]

I'm not saying you don't know it's a tree. I'm saying I'm not watering it.

Maybe this place has one of those plastic ones. [This is said mostly to elicit the horrified reaction she's pretty sure it will get from Daria.]

A plastic tree?! [Why don't you suggest they put up those geeky decorations from the 70s Mom and Dad keep around?] That's just wrong, Daria, even for you!

If you have to have a tree, they're not as messy and you don't have to go trek into the snow to get them every year.

[Daria, you have no Christmas spirit.]

But they're ugly! And they never look like real trees and they don't smell as nice and you can't decorate them as well!

{Well now she's just going to keep going, just to bait Quinn.]

They also don't hold insects, but if you're saying you want the house to play host to bugs for the holidays, I guess maybe they deserve a warm party, too.

But-

[pause]

...bugs? Wait, you mean...Christmas trees have bugs in them?!

They come from outside, planted in the ground. It's pretty safe to say it isn't surprising if they bring bugs into the house. [And sometimes squirrels. She really wants to say it.]

But...but we always have a real tree at home and we've never had bugs!

Look, I already said you can have the real tree. I just don't want to deal with it myself.

[At least that means the end of the scare tactics?]

Fine, I'll take care of it! God, Daria, you're such a Scrooge!

In the meantime, what are you getting me for a present?

[More baiting? You bet. Actually, what she really needs are some ideas for what to get Quinn... She's definitely not fashion-conscious enough to know what Quinn would like for clothes or hair or makeup, and she doesn't really know Quinn's other interests well, but she wants to get something meaningful.]

Ah-ah, Daria! No fair trying to trap me. I've got your gift all figured out, but I am not telling you what it is. [Which is sort of true. She knows what she's getting her, she just...needs to make the actual choice between the three items she's picked out.]

I'll give you credit for working ahead this year.

Do you have a color-coded Christmas list for yourself? [Yep, shameless angling for some ideas of what to give.]

Daria, of course. When have I not color-coded my Christmas list? [But this year she's only coded it by basic colors. In the past she would have coded it right down to the last shade of green. So she's learning not to be super picky! ...well, sort of. She still hasn't figured out it's easier still to do it by basic basic colors, and that cranberry's not a color.]

Good. Send a copy my way, unless you're waiting for the elves to do it. [She... hadn't been consciously thinking about those. Guess Christmas coming up is getting to her a bit.]]

Elves, Daria? Really? [Quinn rolls her eyes.] I'll have it to you by tomorrow, I promise.

[Alright, time to see if she can convince Quinn. For the lulz.]

Elves. That's what they use here. It's another one of the weird things in this place. Maybe one of them can even take your list to Santa.

Really?! Wait, I didn't hear about this. Is this supposed to be a secret? [gasp!!] Are they going to capture and torture us for knowing about it?!

Well, they call it market research for Santa's workshop instead, but it's pretty much the same thing.

[She's not sorry.]

Wow...how did you find out about th-

[And then she narrows her eyes]

Waaait a minute.

What? [Look at that perfect innocence. She could not possibly have been leading this conversation at all.]

Edited 2013-12-18 23:22 (UTC)

Very funny, Daria. [Not the first time Daria's ever tried to trick her. At least this time she caught on sooner, right?]

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